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Ireland downgraded
by Moody's from "stable" to
"we better panic"

Goldman pays hundreds
of millions in fines 'cause they
were big sachs of shit

for some consumers
the "i" in the new iPhone
4 stands for irate

Mayor Bloomberg to
once again purchase his way
right into office

for not much more dough
he could conceivably buy his
way into White House

Steven Seagal sex
case dropped 'cause who wants to think
about his penis

oil cap thought secure
is now leaking what we sure
hope isn't semen

hottest year ever
recorded means planet Earth
is in a fever

tween targeted book
by Palin now 'tween published
and purgatory

air pollution from
traffic links diabetes
to carpocalypse

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