Arts » General Arts

Mike Beas: College bowl season recap

by

comment
You're all cheese-doodled out and your remote control is in dire need of fresh batteries. Worst of all, that one couch cushion you seem to always gravitate toward minutes before kickoff is now a viable candidate for drop-off at the local Goodwill Store.

College bowl season, a 34-game trek spanning 19 days, is almost complete. It's been quite a journey thus far. For instance:

CHICK-FIL-A BOWL: Arrogant first-year coach Lane Kiffin leads Tennessee to a 37-14 loss to Virginia Tech. Couldn't happen to a nicer guy. Because of Kiffin and his well-documented jealousy of Florida coach Urban Meyer, the Vols might be the SEC's most-despised program. Pretty impressive stuff for an average team.

INSIGHT BOWL: Did anyone outside of Ames, Iowa, or Minneapolis watch this game on television? Maybe the better question is was this game even broadcast outside those two cities? In case you missed it - and I'm quite certain you did - Iowa State won, 14-13.

COTTON BOWL: In the latest example of how tradition means nothing when dollar bills are dangled, the Mississippi-Oklahoma State matchup was the first Cotton Bowl game played somewhere other than the revered Cotton Bowl Stadium, which opened in 1932.

Now it takes place, you guessed it, inside the Dallas Cowboys' new stadium. Just when I thought I couldn't like or respect Jerry Jones any less.

HOLIDAY BOWL: Arizona practiced for a month, then traveled to San Diego to produce 109 yards of offense and zero points against Nebraska. The Huskers' 33-0 blanking represented the program's first shutout of an opponent in 46 bowl appearances.

Based on this pitiful performance alone, Arizona should be mathematically eliminated for bowl contention next season. And, frankly, the one after that.

INDEPENDENCE BOWL: Throw out the records when Georgia and Texas A&M meet. No, really, throw them out. The Bulldogs came in 7-5, while the hapless Aggies, who never should have been in a bowl game to begin with, take a glittery 6-7 mark into the offseason.

SUGAR BOWL: Cincinnati's new white helmets proved the perfect sign of things to come for the Bearcats, who then went out and laid an egg in a 51-24 loss to the Florida Fighting Tebows. Speaking of the quarterback who perspires beads of holy water, has there ever been a more-over-publicized college football player?

Great player. Apparently a great kid. But come on already.

MAACO BOWL: The what?

PAPAJOHNS.COM BOWL: While at Florida, Steve Spurrier was the most-feared offensive mind in college football. Now his offenses at South Carolina are inept, particularly around the holidays. Factoring in the 20-7 loss to Connecticut, the Gamecocks have now been outscored 51-17 in their last two bowl games.

Tee up the old golf ball, old ball coach. Time to step down.

NEW ORLEANS BOWL: Middle Tennessee State 42, Southern Miss 32. Quick, name one player on either team. Trust me, you're not alone.

Comments

This Week's Flyers

Around the Web